Is Tinder worth the hassle?

Wednesday, 13 May 2015

The idea of using a dating site or app has always been daunting to me, especially when it came to looking for the right guy. It's hard to get to know someone properly and know if they are telling the truth, sure someone can lie about themselves in person but at least you can see their body language and facial expressions when they are sat in front of you. One of my mates told me I should try out tinder after my break up in September, at the time I was told I was a bit iffy about it due to the fact that you and whoever else's profile is looking at yours swipe left for no on your profile or right for yes based on your looks or what you've wrote in your description and if you both swiped right on each other's profile then it's a match. I'm not the kind of girl that chooses a guy based on looks, there is more to a person then the way they look, they have to have other qualities such as a sense of humour/make me laugh, or have at least a few things in common with me. 

But what I found was a lot of guys that just wanted to sleep with me or wanted to be friends with benefits, I personally wanted to become friends with a guy first and not rush into a relationship with someone straight away because I had just gone through a break up. Luckily for me not all the guys were dicks in fact some just wanted to chat because they were lonely, others said hi once and never spoke again. I had been matched with James in October last year on tinder and we had loads to talk about, we developed a friendship online and decided to meet up in January then become a couple the day after Valentine's Day. The reason why I liked James is because he didn't objectify me, in fact he didn't speak about sex he just got to know me and I got to know him, when we were both not comfortable with discussing certain things we respected each other and didn't pressure one another to discuss it. I think if you're looking for love on tinder just don't expect a Prince Charming, there are some good guys on there but more and more people are using tinder as a place to hook up! The amount of profiles I saw with descriptions that said "in Cornwall for a week, looking for someone to hook up with" was shocking. Even when I was open with guys and said I didn't drive and I had a heart condition they unmatched me or never spoke to me again, but fair enough that's their choice if they want a girl who drives I hope they find one.

I do urge people to be careful when they meet up with anyone on the Internet, let someone know where you're going and who this person is (from what they have told you). I don't think there is anything wrong with meeting people from the online world as I've been doing it for years, my first boyfriend and I met on MySpace and we were together for over a year, but my sister and her boyfriend both came with me when I met up with him to make sure I was safe. Right now I'm happy with James and I hope we stay happy and our relationship develops more eventually and I don't regret using Tinder to find him, but just because I found a good guy on tinder doesn't mean everyone will. I've seen a few of my guy mates post about their experiences when it comes to girls on tinder and to be honest they sound just the same as the guys who want sex or to be fuck buddies, I don't wish to say all men are like it when women can be just as bad, in fact this morning I was reading about girls who get guys to buy them food on tinder, I don't think that's funny or clever I think it's very manipulative and if any guy or girl tries to make you do this unmatch them straight away, nobody likes a user. If you're the kind of person who is willing to go through a bunch or dickish people wanting to use you for sex based on looks just to find a good guy like I did I wish you luck, but if it's just not working seriously delete the tinder app, I personally think it's not worth the upset and hassle.